Project Impact...

"A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives..."
~Jackie Robinson

As I was putting the ticket stubs and MAX tickets away in our keepsake box, I flipped over this little post card that a PGE Park employee handed us as we left the game the other night. I really like the quote and thought it was worth sharing.

The quote made me think about how true it is on so many different levels. There are the obvious ones but I got to thinking about how it pertains to being a mother. Sure, as a mom I have an undeniable impact on my children's lives, that's a given. It is fair though to remind myself that I also control what kind of impact it is. I give them memories every day, are they the type of memories that I want to be giving them? Am I teaching them life lessons in a fun way? Or am I too uptight and wrapped up in myself and my "concerns" to let go a bit and have fun? I'd like to think not on the last issue.

I have been making a conscious effort to get back to being the fun mom that I used to be "before". I know that the tone of this blog is going to shift a bit as the up days become more frequent and the down days grow fewer and further between. That doesn't mean for one second that I'm better, that I'm over it, that I've healed... I probably never will. From experience, lucky me, I do know that the days will get easier and that's totally ok, actually, it's more than ok. It's GREAT! However, I am prepared for those days when I slip back into the grumps, the pity party, the poor me attitude. But in reality, there's not a lot for me to say "poor me" about. If I'm sad about losing my son, that's pure selfishness. He's in a better, perfect place and I will get to meet him the right way some day.

I have been working on scheduling a few more things in our lives. Gas prices are going to eat us alive since we live so far out of town but the kids, and me too for that matter, deserve to get out. We have spent way too much time at home since those fateful days in February. Today we headed to the park in town with some friends. We played a bit, had a picnic lunch and then played some more. We realized how cliche' it seemed to be having a play date at a park but I'm thinking cliche or not, the kids all loved it. The day started out pretty cloudy but by the middle of our park visit it was sunny and arguably almost hot. The weather was perfect and R has pink cheeks tonight to prove it! They all played on the play ground and then we changed our clothes and played on the spray ground. By the time I had started dinner, it was raining outside. I'm thrilled that we grabbed our window of opportunity and enjoyed today for what it was.

It was such a simple outing but the kids loved it. I need to make sure that every day, every moment has a positive impact on the lives around me. Here are a few photos from today...