Five

Five years ago.
I still remember exactly where I was, what I was doing, feeling, the weather. Everything.
I still think about those events every. single. day.
Not everything... I don't dwell. But the memories, they drift in and out like butterflies and sometimes catch me off guard. Even after 1825 days.
I'm still sad. Sometimes.
I'm still angry. Sometimes.
But I still laugh. (dude, have you MET my rainbow? she's hilarious!)
And I keep moving forward. Because that's just what you do. You have to. There isn't a choice in the matter really. And moving forward is a great thing.
I can't decide whether it's sad or joyous that the support system that was there in the early days has diminished so very greatly. Layer after layer has gently peeled away but also, I allowed myself to let go of those relationships that were hanging on beyond their expiration date. And it's OK.
It's OK that no one remembered this year.
I did.
I always will.