15 weeks 1 day...

Does that sound like a long time or a short time to you? That's how long it's been since I delivered Eli... I can't say "gave birth" because to me that means life as does "was born"... so usually I just say that's when I delivered him.

I have done a lot of thinking and a lot of writing and a lot of crying and even some laughing over that span of time. A lot of the time I feel like I'm doing much better but then you get those days - those gray, rainy, Pacific Northwest days that make you just want to pack up and head some where, any where where it's sunny. That will be something we do before too long if we have to.

It's strange because even though my life feels like it's kind of been in this weird in between place no body elses has stopped. My friends that are due to have their babies after me are all huge and cute and round and I'm back to 'normal'. They're complaining about being uncomfortable (the one huge pet peeve I have now) and I'm sleeping 'normally' - falling asleep on my stomach and waking up on my back - without worry of harming the child inside of me, because there isn't one. Blah. If the sun would make an appearance, I'd be glad that I was able to run around with the kids, sit in the sun and not be at all uncomfortable and clumsy but since all we're doing is hanging out in our sweats in the house, I sometimes feel like I might as well be round and pregnant. But I'm not. Anyway, that's enough of a vent there.

Back to yesterday. The pre-school visit went really well. K will have NO problem adjusting - she wanted to stay. The classes were on their bathroom and water break when we left and the hall was filled with a chorus of "Bye Karleigh!" so I think we're ok there. When we got back in the car she did say that she wished there were real desks so she could learn easier. I explained that in pre-school, most kids get to sit at those neat little tables instead of desks. She seemed to accept that answer only when I offered that cutting and pasting are easier at a table than at a little desk. Man, those chairs are SHORT though!

We then moved on to the mall to do a little shopping as evidenced by the outfit in the pic from yesterday and stopped at Starbucks for some "pink coffee". The barista's were so sweet to her - it could be because she walked up to the counter with total authority and ordered a "pink coffee please"! The barista asked her her name and so she told her. The lady asked "with a C?" and K said "no with a K... K...A...R...L, right mom? (me:yup!) ummm, E... or I?... E... I... G... H - that's it". They thought it was a beautiful spelling - which it is and every letter has meaning but it isn't the easiest one to spell. But, obviously, she'll get used to it! So, "Karleigh" and "Karleigh's Mommy" got our drinks and wandered down to the pet store.

It's times like that that I realize that my life is still moving on even when part of it feels like it's standing still too. That's what I mean about it being a really strange place for me. I'm actually looking forward to it next year though. We've been leading a pretty blissfully unscheduled life the last year or so, after being too over scheduled and scattered. It will be nice to get into a consistent routine. Maybe THAT will help me feel more like a grown up!