Hummm....

I was/am curious about how I'm going to feel this weekend. I can tell I'm getting kind of "edgy" and that's not really a good thing. I am not too surprised though. I do have my two little crazies but at the same time that makes me more acutely aware of missing Eli. I find it interesting and totally aggravating when someone means well and will say something like 'well at least you have the two you have...' these well meaning people probably have never had to make cremation or funeral arrangements for a child that is no longer with them or they would realize that really, that's a totally asinine statement to make. It would be like me saying to someone who just buried their mother 'yah, but at least your dad is alive...' true statement, but it sure doesn't lessen the sting of the loss. I don't know, that's just kind of the way I'm feeling this evening. It doesn't help that the weather is not going to cooperate at all this weekend so our yard is beginning to meld with the fields and I'm not going to be able to just sit out in the yard next to Eli's garden and enjoy ourselves as our family minus one - which was the only thing I had planned for tomorrow.


K and R do certainly keep me laughing and for that I AM very grateful... Seriously, who could resist these faces?

But, now I am going to go spend some time with the family and eat some chocolate Hostess cupcakes!