Anything?...

After 140 posts, I think maybe, just maybe, I have come to a point where I'm still thinking things but getting them down on paper, er, the screen is a bit tough lately. Maybe I should have taken more pictures today to share here instead!

Oh, first update... my dad is still in the hospital. They are working on getting his sodium levels raised. That seems to be what started the latest chain of events, which led to a second seizure last night and my mom carting him off to the ER. He'll probably be there for a few days getting supplements to improve those levels and figure out why they are so low to begin with.

second update, which isn't really an update but more of a thought... which I shouldn't really have entertained since it wouldn't change anything but I do have a theory as to what caused Eli's heart to stop beating. Last October I had a small growth removed from my scalp. SIMPLE procedure in the Dr.'s office. Prior to the incision, the doctor decided that I should have a tetanus shot... but not just your regular run of the mill tetanus shot... the new fancy TdaP - tetanus, diphtheria and pertussis. "Coincidentally" within a couple of days, I could barely move my arm and just felt sick all over. I had planned on taking the kids up to my parents house so that we could go to the Halloween Carnival where my mom teaches. I remember getting out of the car at their house and telling my dad "I feel like my entire body has been poisoned". I took some Advil and felt better for the carnival. I was woken up that night from itching. I had a hard time waking up but thought, "gosh, there must be something in the sheets, the cat must have brought a flea in..." as I woke more I realized that I was covered in hives. I spent the rest of the weekend in the recliner in the family room just about topped out on Benadryl. The meds didn't make them go away but it did provide some relief. I started doing some research on my own and with my non-vax'ing mom friends and found that I was probably having a reaction to the pertussis component of the vaccine. It was too late at that point - the "poison" was already in my system. For weeks off and on I had hives, I was never able to figure out what was initiating them. Eggs, Coke, and my prenatal vitamin seemed to set them off. Benadryl is a "safe" med to take during pregnancy so that's not my concern or thought. I really think that since I conceived just 2 weeks after the vaccination that that probably caused the problem. I think it's very likely that my body kept attacking this "foreign thing" that Eli just couldn't fight anymore. I don't have proof and I never will. I don't need it. I know there's nothing that I could do or could have done to prevent it - other than birth control but it all makes sense. While I was researching the side-effects of this vaccine (sadly after the fact) there were quite a few notations of miscarriage and stillbirth but since this is a vaccine that many younger adults (those entering college) receive, there was also a fair amount of notation as to a lack of prenatal care. I don't know. At times it seems like a stretch to tie the two together but at the same time, in hindsight, it makes a lot of sense.

Thanks for reading through my whole stream of consciousness there if you were able to. I don't question why things turned out the way they did but my heart is leaning towards this as being a very reasonable explanation.