Friday Flashback!

A picture from Karleigh's 1st Spring. I was lying in bed the other night, just trying to imagine life with another baby girl in our family... what she'll weigh, when she'll be born, who she'll look like, what her personality will be like... I'm having a hard time (even with her acting like she wants out, right NOW! as I type this) picturing having her with us. I don't remember feeling this way so much with Karleigh or Rylan but I'm sure I did.
Right?
This IS normal.
Right?
Back to my thought, when I was lying in bed thinking about her, I started thinking about this picture of Karleigh. This was her first experience with grass against her skin. I'm looking very much forward to a whole new set of firsts, much better than the set of firsts that come with pregnancy loss.

February is a tough month for a lot of my loss momma friends so I'm glad it's a short month. The gateway to Spring and new beginnings.

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I think I may have things set ok, for now, with the new layout. If you come across something that's missing or not working right, can you please let me know?
Thank you!

Remodeling

I'm going to start installing the new blog layout so things may be a bit wonky for a while.

...like my list of blogs that went missing already! Grrr. :)

It's ok though - I haven't felt the greatest so it's a great project while just sitting around today and this weekend. I hope to get everyone added back, but if I miss you please don't be offended just leave me a comment with your blog address again and I'll get you back up!

Thursday "Tour"

I'm finally at a point with the big girl/baby girl room where I'm feeling pretty good and done enough to share some photos. It's been a bit of a challenge since Karleigh has to be able to live there so I have had to do bits and pieces while she's at school or on weekends where it doesn't matter if she has to stay up a bit later for me to finish a project. I'm sure it will change a bit before baby girl gets here. There's still one little wall (behind the hall door) that I'm trying to decide how to finish off. I do know that the diaper pail will go there so I'm still thinking a few shelves, for books, above it. We'll see. Right now Karleigh's doll house is there but that's currently being neglected... it's in a down phase right now so I'll probably store it away for a while and when it comes back out in a few months, it'll be like brand new again!

I have a number of deeper thoughts that I've been trying to process and work through but until I can get them all untangled to a point where I might sound a little less crazy ;) I'm going to continue to try to work through them. As a quick peek into "it"... I filled out my birth center preregistration over a week ago. I still haven't mailed it. It's a postage paid envelope. And they requested that it be sent in over a month ago. It'll get done, I'm just tripping on sending it out. I've walked into that hospital 3 times and walked out once knowing my baby had died and twice leaving their tiny bodies behind. Yah. That might have something to do with my hang-up.

Anyway! Enough of that, you my peeps like pics so here! Have I mentioned that this is a tiny room? Yah, I think I have but I also feel like we've utilized the space to its maximum in both form and function. At least I hope so. As I recall it's about 11 feet by 9 feet and set for two girls.











So, there it is. There is more that I would like to add but at the same time I know that any more and it's going to start to look really cluttered and that will just drive me bonkers. It's been a really fun process especially since Karleigh is so into helping. In fact she chose the curtains and the fabric for her headboard. I think she did a really good job!

Before This Week is Gone

I figured I had better get this pic posted before the week is gone! That seems to be one of the things with pregnancy... and I'm finding even more with pregnancy after losses... that time not only crawls at a snails pace but it also flies by. No matter how much you try to ignore time or try to really count down the days, whichever makes you feel better... there's no denying it: there will be an end to this short leg of the journey.

I have to say I feel like she and I - we - have grown a ton over the last week. Her movements are starting to hurt at times, especially when she gets a foot up by my ribs and pushes out until my skin won't stretch any more. It's reassuring though, even if I am saying "owie!" On a really bright side, I'm still sleeping really well most nights. I don't know if it's from working so hard during the day or if I'm just lucky/blessed to be able to fall asleep and sleep through the night most nights. While I do love it and enjoy it now, I'm also ready to be awoken every two hours or so before too long. :)


I am really thankful that I got started on all the house projects a couple weeks ago. We were working on our bedroom last night and I think both Jim and I realized how ungraceful I've become and how things that would normally be so simple for me... well, they're more difficult now and I sound like an old man half the time as well. Grunting and groaning when I move, yah, pregnancy is hot! It's good though. We're almost finished with our big projects like the whole room flip-flop and decorating. Some of our other projects are going to have to wait until it dries out outside. It's been SO mild this last month or so but it's still been too wet (and frankly too soon before spring/summer) to accomplish some of the outside projects that I would like to get done before little miss gets here.

Wow, that was kind of a rather boring re-cap! Hopefully I'll have something a bit more exciting to talk about in the near future. Or not. Boring can be very, very good! :)

Technically Speaking

I'm feeling like a techno-challenged chick...

Firefox users - I just realized that my header is not center justified for you. Sorry about that, it looks yucky. How pathetic that I didn't check it, oh... a YEAR ago when I re-did everything.

Yes, when I re-did everything by just hacking at the code until I liked the way the layout looked just the way I wanted it at the time. Cool right? Sure. Until you go back and want to change things up again. That makes it ROUGH! So... there will be a new (hopefully cleaner and simpler) blog look it just might not be today or tomorrow or anytime too soon. It may be a great project for when I've slowed down a bit more and have a few more of the physically demanding things checked off of my to-do-before-spring list.

My Lilypie ticker has apparently decided that it wants to stall out and not automatically count down, like it's supposed to. I didn't generate that code so I can't blame it on myself. In fact yesterday when I was messing around with it I changed some dates around and the ticker was getting all messed up. It's not terribly uncommon for Lilypie but it's annoying for me and anyone else who needs no help feeling like they're losing their mind. "Hey, I thought she was 28 weeks, 3 days ago..." Yah. Hopefully they get that worked out soon!

Perhaps I should just stick to the actual, tangible, things right now and not all this "magic" technical stuff. I'm having a little better luck with using my hands. Yesterday I took some (way too much) time and made the mobile for above the crib. I'm pretty happy with how it turned out. I had a thought in mind for what I wanted, set out to look for it and did find what I was looking for... to the tune of more than $50. So, thinking that was a bit excessive for what turned out to be around 64 cents in craft card stock, 59 cents for a dowel and 2 dollars for some pink glass beads, I set out (with the help of a few items that I already had at home) to make my own.

It was a time consuming project but it's fun to know that I was the one who put the work in. I even added some sparkly clear glass beads that were from a broken necklace that must have been my great-grandma's. And all you safety minded people, the mobile is out of the reach of any little hands and can be moved closer to the ceiling when necessary to keep it that way. It has such a relaxing movement so I'm really happy that it wasn't a total disaster!

Today will be spent trying to scratch a few more things off of our list and probably a lazy movie day for the kiddos who are still really trying to fight off a nasty chest cold. It's tough when I love the cuddle time but also really want to try to remain healthy myself. Lots of hand washing, lots of reminders to "cover your cough!" and "please use a tissue and not your sleeve!"

I Like Fridays

Well, I do.

Not that weekends or week days really mean that much when you're a stay-at-home-mom whose husband usually works on Saturday but still, I like them. Friday is when I get to tick off another week completed in this pregnancy (by the most conservative date I've been given). I feel accomplished on Friday and usually have a burst of house cleaning / project completing energy. Anyway, I guess that's just to say that I'm in a pretty good mood today.

Jim was out of town, overnight, for work yesterday and both kids have pretty nasty coughs. In fact Rylan stayed home from preschool yesterday and again today. So, it was very quiet in the house last night after about 7 pm. I decided that would be a great time to work on a painting that I've been thinking about for the girls' room. I wonder when I'm going to get used to saying that? I have really liked the tress/branches/birds that people are using in their decorating lately but I didn't really want to go the stick on vinyl route. We used some "removable" decorating stickers shortly after Karleigh turned two and 6 months later when she changed her mind about wanting to stare at Dora characters every day, we removed them. Some of them left sticky residue behind, some took paint with them and some came off nice and clean just like they were supposed to. I didn't feel like risking that again. The other option was to just paint it directly onto the wall but with the super smooth surface of our walls, when it came time to paint over it, I'm sure I would have to have sanded to get the brush strokes and texture off the wall before painting over it. Also not the best idea in my book. So? I compromised and moved to something that I was more comfortable with. Stretched canvas.

Last night I got the whole thing painted, pretty close to what I had imagined in my head, and got the set hung up this morning. They hang next to Karleigh's bed between the wall and the window. She used to have letters that spelled DREAM in that spot in her old room but, believe it or not, they did not fit in the new space. So, three 12x12 canvases it is!

I had my 28 week appointment on Wednesday where we did all the regular stuff - I've added almost 20 pounds already. Yikes! I only gained 19 with Rylan but 40 with Karleigh so I guess I'll end up somewhere in the middle. 25 to 30 was what I should have been aiming for so we'll see. I haven't been making any effort about it one way or another. Along with the regular OB appointment stuff I also had my glucose test to check for gestational diabetes. At the time of the blood draw they also drew iron levels. I got the call back yesterday and my glucose levels were well within normal limits. Woohoo! The iron on the other hand? Not so much woohoo. Apparently I'm anemic enough that my doc doesn't think I'll get my numbers up with foods alone so now I'm on an iron supplement. No biggie though. I'd rather know now and get it straightened out before delivery. I'll be interested to see how my energy levels are in about a week or so. I'd been feeling more tired - needing to take more breaks - than I remembered having to before. We'll see!

All in all, it's been a pretty good week even with sick kiddos. Jim's birthday was Tuesday. We're getting things crossed off our to-do list... you like how I said "our"? ;) And we're one week closer. Closer to what exactly, I'm not sure I know. Believe it or not, I haven't thought about how our lives are going to change. It's just been very matter-of-fact, if/when she comes home we'll do x,y,z to make things work. There's been physical planning but, at least for me, not a whole lot of emotional planning. I'm having a hard time going to that place.

Oh! But on a super duper happy note: our hospital has lifted their H1N1 ban. Karleigh was beyond mad that she was not going to be allowed to visit her sister in the hospital after she was born and that she was going to have to wait until we brought the baby home. I'm pretty happy about it too. So, now we just need to come up with a couple of kid care plans for D day. Of course my mom would like to be here and do the grandma thing but frankly, Rylan's labor and birth was so fast (4 hours) compared to Karleigh's labor and birth (38 hours!!!) that she didn't even make it to the hospital before we were both all cleaned up and just hanging out. Anyway. Another thought for another time!

Life and Third Trimester

Life!
Last night we all attended Karleigh's first Daisy Scout Court of Awards ceremony where the girls received the 3 petals they have earned so far this year. Her leader did a great job making it special by obtaining use of the stage at the school and having refreshments afterwards. It was a very short ceremony and at 7 pm, with a group of nine 5 and 6 year olds... that is a very good thing! The girls did great and Karleigh had a blast being the main "speaker" while leading the ceremony.

Such a funny group of girls. Nine girls, about 20 cameras, poor things! This was about as good as the group shot got. :) It's so much fun to watch them develop friendships with each other. During refreshment with their families, the girls all sat at the same table with each other instead of hanging out with the families. It was hilarious to listen to them chatter away.

And can I say, I thought the way that her leader attached the petals to the foam flowers was brilliant and so cute! Of course we'll give them back so she can use them again but I thought it was such a great idea. I'm a sucker for stuff like that!
Also, this gaggle of girls, it's hilarious to try to keep everyone straight: Karleigh, Kayla, Kelly, Laney, Chloe, Kenzie, Trista, Kailey and Juliann. We do a lot of "hey"-ing at the meetings. :) Anyway, it's fun to watch the girls experience life and the friendships that go along with it.

Third Trimester!
I also realized (because I've been trying to take things day by day) that I'm happily there! I promised myself that I was going to take more belly pics this time. I have a few from Karleigh and Rylan, one from Collin and I was so upset that sadly, I deleted all of my belly pics from when I was pregnant with Eli. Dumb. I wish I could change it but I can't so I'm making sure that I have them this time. I don't think I really look much different this week but she feels bigger and spends a lot of time with her feet in my ribs so I can tell she's growing and stretching!

While I was taking these pics, Rylan (the poor soon to be middle child) wandered in. He asked what I was doing and I told him that I was taking pictures of my tummy. So, he said he wanted to too. Who am I to argue? I got one good one from him and then he remembered the beeps for the timer on my camera and it went downhill from there with lots of last second ninja moves, but this one is a keeper :) Just him being his sweet self without his fake, cheese, smile.

This was one sneak attack that actually turned out pretty cute too. It was his favorite so I decided to work with it for him.


I always feel bad when I do a post without pictures. So hopefully this makes up a little bit for my last post!